Take your time

Hola lovelies! 🤗❤️ How are you doinggggg I pray that Allah blessed you every single day. Wowwwww it’s februaryyy! How fast time past. Ok moving on,  I’m here updating  my condition as there’s a  beautiful people in my circle who ask about me. I’m deactivate my personal social media, to take a rest. I’m in my vacation from it. Hewhew 😝 Alhamdulillah guys, l’m doing good ☺️ physically, mentally and spiritually. My heart feel at ease. Serenity hugs me with Allah mercy. Allah save me from myself. He showed me the way. For me to write this and reaching out. The time when I plead Him to help me going thru this tests was the moment of my darkness. I found my everlasting light. He’s the Most Glorious towards His servants. His kindness, He listens to all my pain. His promises do came true. It’s a temporary phase of my feelings. He showed me the way for healing. 

Now, I trust the words of “You will be blessed with light like darkness never comes in your life before”. I began to find my way in one moment, where I open back my past memories treasure box. 10 years ago (approx. in Nov 2020) which I’m 14 years old. Alhamdulillah, I’m having a good old days. Found my letter from my dearest friend. Missing each of them (May Allah ease your struggles and whatever you’re going thru). Remember the phrases of “the meet and separate because of Allah” I was like walking in my memories tunnel, I cried, I laughed when I saw their photos and the memories. It was blessed to have them. I learn a lot, until now each person who come and go give me lessons. Throwback melodies playing in my brain. “ I said to myself, hell yeah! You enjoy your time and every lil’ things happen. Are you where you wanna be now?” Hahaha Alhamdulillah, my answer was “Allah plans better than my plan.” Suddenly like magic tho I found my passion too! and my purpose in this world. That's was awesome! I eagerly to tell my mom about it. She was gleeful to heard that I’ve found myself. my purposes! Aha, my mom also the one who’s Allah sends to be with me during my hard times. My fellow friends, who’s lending me their shoulder to be cry. Their words really encourage and makes my heart flutter. 

I’m going slowly, I’m taking my time in everything I do, slow down and be kind to myself. MasyaAllah, a great feeling transform. Me in the past always in rush. But now, I can control myself with Allah’s help. I’ve no worries with my unchecked to-do list. I do great things, went to my therapist for my session, taking meds, doing my self-therapy, get to know my BSK family! discover new things to stimulate my lovely happy booster. 

I’m grateful and blessed that: 

I’m awake. 

I’m moving my body.

I pray 

I’m taking my bath.

I’m brushing my teeth.

I’m washing my face.

I do my skincare routine.

I wear nice cloth.

I prepare for breakfast 

I eat 

I cooked

I’m planning my day

I hug my family 

I learn something new 

I do journaling

I read books

I watch movies/drama 

I listen to good songs/ music 

I dance 

I sang 

I write 

I reach out 

I replied my message 

I’m taking deep breath. 

and many morezzzzz (lots of it!) 

Alhamdulillah Ya Wadud, Ya Bari’ for gives me the best plan in my life. You’re forever and always be my best planner. I practice this 1 Doa and sharing to you guys. It’s about rely myself to Him, cause sometimes I don’t believe in me. But I believe that He loves me beyond my imaginary. So, I ask Allah to save me from myself. Hope it helps. Happy practice 🤗

Lastly, here comes my lalaallalalalaallaaaaa thoughts( I want to make a poem, but my sleepy head ruin my words huhuhuhu sokay dearself 🙈) 

People say we need to trust action not words, I’m the one who’s inside ‘people say’ in the past. But without me realise, there’s a lot of words calm my nerves. One of it was ‘take your time’. It’s really like hug me, comfort me, save me and give me path to rearrange my mind. As for me, I trust words because in the right time and right moment, it comes to heal. Of course Allah plan it. I know it’s You, Ya rabbi. Any words, that catch your deep heart especially Allah’s words from quran  was really calming to be heard and read. Many of wounded stories from our prophet that we can learn. How their heal thru Allah’s words. (Huhhh reminder for me to do tadabbur for ayat quran hikhiks 🙈) 

The beginning of action, habit and journey depends on effort we strive to self-betterment everyday. okkkkkkkk I’m ending my blogging here zzzzzzzzzz Thank you for reading 🤍☁️ 

Love,

Nichaaaa 

Wrote on 1st February, 11.30 pm, Sunday

Malaysia MCO 2.0 day 26.